I’m sorry

From my diary/journal:

16/05/2016: I’m sorry, I really am. I’m sorry for everything I’ve put you through in the past year and a half. I’m sorry for hurting you, sabotaging you and thinking you weren’t enough. I’m sorry for the extreme dieting, the crazy binge eating and emotional eating, the weight gain, the hair loss, the dehydration, the clothes that don’t fit, the calorie counting obsession, the messed-up period, the tears, the pity, the pain, the mirror hate.

I’m sorry for all the times I got mad at you, for when I didn’t care, for calling you fat and awful, for hurting the animals, the planet and your body. I’m sorry for not being strong enough to stand for your health, for numbing your emotions, for just hating on you the whole fucking time. You simply don’t deserve all of this, you don’t deserve any of this. 

You’re beautiful, girl. You’re awesome and you rock at everything you do. You’re great at studying, teaching, blogging, loving, cooking, drawing, joking, writing, working out, planning, organizing. You’re gorgeous and you should NEVER let anyone (myself included) tell you you’re not. Shake it off, you know better. And just so you know it, I love you and I truly forgive you for everything.




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